Lessons From Four Decades

It’s almost hard to believe that I’m celebrating the end of my first four decades on this earth. I certainly don’t think 40 is old, and maybe not even the half way point of my life, but as with most things, age is relative. While we were walking to the grocery store the other day, my preschooler asked me if I’d be 4 on my next birthday. I said “well, 4 with a 0 behind it. That’s about 10 times your age buddy.” He looked at me and said “31 is old.” It was so cute and said with so much love that I couldn’t possibly be offended. I know he can count to 40, but it probably never occurred to him that 31 comes before 40. Ah, the logic of a preschooler.

I get a little tickled at the people that live in our small town. For the most part they marry young, and they stay married. By the time many of them are in their 40’s they become grandparents, and they look forward to holding their grandbabies. Here I am at 40 and Alan in his mid 50’s, and we are holding our own infant daughter and toddler and preschooler sons. There is something to be said for children keeping one young. I suspect we are a bit of an enigma to some of the people in this town. I had one older woman stop me on the street last summer when she realized I was pregnant, and she asked me if we did this on purpose. I just smiled and said oh yes, and we’re looking forward to this baby.

I have always believed that birthdays beyond childhood are not just a commemoration of the day one was born; they are a celebration of the person’s life and what that individual has accomplished thus far. So what have I learned in 40 years and what do I want to pass on to my children? Here is the short list.

We are responsible for our happiness. No one can make us happy (or angry, or sad, or disappointed). We control our feelings and choose our emotions.

Joy is what we are not what we have. True joy comes from self satisfaction…a peace about who one is. Joy is what endures; it is what is left after the happiness fades.

Life is a precious gift, and so are the lives God has entrusted to our care.

Living by God’s principles is a fulfilling, peaceful way to conduct one’s life. People who do, sleep better at night.

A kiss and a hug, a simple show of love, can heal lots of wounds.

Praise, compliments, and affirmations are more productive and accepted than criticism and judgment.

Opinions vary, and everyone has one. Ask questions, listen, evaluate, and make an informed decision. Then move forward with resolve and determination.

Follow your passion. Your world will be a better place for your efforts.

I suspect this list of realizations will only grow during the coming years. After all, God isn’t finished with me yet.